After giving this some thought you’ll be relieved to hear that I decided maybe this was a little inappropriate and immature.
So I won’t tell you about the time we were on a family holiday and Geoffrey decided that he’d gone five minutes without annoying someone. So in adhering to his principles he quickly found an activity that would irritate a hapless younger victim. He began to walk in closer proximity to my heels than I could tolerate. However this didn’t last very long as I took evasive action. Increasing my speed I walked towards a low metal bar, ducking at the last moment, leaving Geoffrey to plunder awkwardly into the obstacle. Keeping to the holiday theme, I certainly won’t mention any of the long car drives to North West Tassie where one of Geoffrey’s trademarks when sitting in the back seat was to wait for the opportune moment when the trip had been peaceful for too long; at which point he would hit the two children seated in front of him simultaneously and watch the ensuing conflict unfold with great satisfaction. Of course it’s way off limits to discuss any of the long draining arguments that occurred between him and his parents. Not that I would tell you if I knew or anything – but I can’t actually remember what any of the arguments were about. All I remember is that some of them lasted for days. It was wearing enough to be in the same house let alone be on the receiving end. (Cough) Good luck Sharni!
In understanding what sort of activities Geoffrey pursued in the lengthy period before I was born, I did what anyone from my generation – that is those born in the nineties or later—would do: I googled typical eighties activities. It turns out that the 1980s were a decade filled with “scrunchies, tight spandex and big hair”. That’s about as far as my research took me before I was preoccupied with other things.
But after the initial honeymoon period (pun intended), Geoffrey came to realise that a playmate may not be such a bad idea. If I can trust my memories of the times spent together as children, I believe we got on relatively well in spite of the generational gap inevitable between eighties and nineties babies. From racing trikes around the corner in our backyard (featuring many collisions of course), to playing basketball at the hoop next door, backyard cricket and riding bikes, memories of these outdoor activities tend to dominate the early years.
Following the years spent together as children I decided it might not be such a bad idea to follow Geoffrey into the teens. And so we became teenagers. During our teenage years I think there were a few more conflicts between us. A lingering memory is a period where he was determined to be in bed before nine and the house was to be absolutely silent. This did not comply with my personal rehearsal schedule and resulted in multiple disagreements which made life interesting for all involved.
Unfortunately I can’t tell you too many embarrassing stories about Sharni’s childhood that wouldn’t be completely fabricated. So I will leave that to the maid of honour perhaps. What I can tell you is that from my observations Sharni is a delightful character and Geoffrey is clearly lucky to have met her. Despite lingering health concerns Sharni is always smiling and positive.
I suppose their relationship can be likened to the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for the winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But when the winter came, and the grasshopper died, the octopus ate all his acorns. And also he got a race car. As to the relevance of the previous few sentences, you’ll have to question my younger brother. The quote from Futurama or something was included upon his recommendation.
On that note, I wish Geoffrey and Sharni all the best for a long and happy marriage.
So here’s to the happy couple.